Managing Anger
Introduction
Angry behavior at home, on the road and at the workplace is on the rise everywhere, what with increasing work pressures, inadequate sleep and interpersonal tensions that are the hallmark of modern life. Angry behavior manifests in several ways- snapping at people, yelling, banging doors and sulking.
When we are angry we end up saying and doing things that have disastrous consequences. You might be a very efficient and valuable employee, but one inappropriate demonstration of anger could cost you your reputation or that much desired raise. While anger is a universal and valid emotion, we should learn to manage it and express our anger in appropriate ways. Given below are a few tips to how you can stay in control no matter what.
Understand Yourself
This means that you should have a clear idea of what presses the wrong buttons for you. Identify situations that make you lose your temper and try to avoid them in the first place. This could be having to wait for a long time at the bank or being held at the traffic jam in the rush hour. Try online banking, start a little earlier from home- do something that could keep you from having to encounter the unpleasant situation.
Plan Ahead
Whenever possible, plan how you will respond to an unpleasant situation. For instance, you don’t like meeting people first thing in the morning when you arrive at work. Plan your appointments for a later time in the day. Prepare your report a day before you have to submit it if an unexpected situation could prevent you from doing it at the last moment.
Check Your Understanding
Develop the habit of double checking the other person’s intentions before you react impulsively to what sounds as an offensive comment. Give the other person a chance to clarify their intentions.
Give Respect and Take Respect
It is important to know that it just does not pay to throw your weight around. If someone does not agree with your idea, ask what their thoughts and try to see if they have a point. If you feel that someone is targeting you, learn to respond with dignity.
Avoid Being Trigger Happy
Many of us want to give vent to our anger over the phone or in a letter whenever something goes wrong. This is unhealthy, especially when you are at work. You might have every reason to be angry, but still refrain from using the phone or text media when you are upset. Even if you write something on the spur of the moment, keep it for the next day and read it again. Take a second opinion on anything that could give the wrong message to the person receiving your letter/ email.
Apologize
If you do end up saying or doing the wrong thing despite all precautions, be ready to apologize. Do this at the earliest possible moment. Don’t go on a defensive with a long speech to justify your behavior. Say that you should not have reacted in that manner and that you are sorry about it. This shows professionalism and character.